Gracious Lord, I’m feeling pressure, and it’s me. I do this to myself and wonder why I feel this way. And then there’s You. Arms open, offering shelter. Show me the way. Over and over, remind me the way to peace is You. Lean me to listen and look, for places and spaces of grace. That’s where I find you, always there. Waiting available always. Amen & amen.

If you’re a person with curiosity of 𝘸𝘩𝘺, dissecting into the a chosen habit into your 𝘞𝘏𝘠 can be greatly helpful. I find it insightful to separate the nuts and bolts of a chosen habit.

If you understand your personal why for the habit, you’ll identify if you’ve chosen that habit from a posture of choice versus obligation.

Choosing a habit from choice offers its own level of internal motivation; a habit from an emotional stance of obligation brings negative emotions surrounding the habit.

Gracious Lord, Is it wrong, the way I question myself over and over daily. Is it a disrespect to You when I doubt daily, overthink, over analyze, over perfect or procrastinate? I need to know, know how to seek more, lean closer to listen, sensitive to Your voice alone, only You always. Slow down to smooth and soothe, clarity its’ own interdependent momentum. Breathe in peace, breathe out fret-let that be the daily prayer, Your peace flowing. Always. Amen & amen.

There’s this place, four hours from here. And there’s this wild nature, phenomena they call it. These spikes of evergreen reaching to heaven, these trees are foraged yearly by invasive insect foragers. And from a distance, one might think these trees are ready to fall, to collapse under the weight, eaten away.

What the trained eye might notice?

These trees aren’t single ringed. They are fighters, fighting off the demons that nibble at them. They still grow. Year after year, one harsh season after another, they still look up battered and bruised, reaching to the sky in it all.

I haven’t gardened hardcore in several years. It’s not that I don’t enjoy gardening-I do. We once did organic gardening in a barren fields with hand tools, the callouses are permanent at this point. It was life changing-mainly because I was determined I’d figure out how to get the absolute healthiest food for our sick toddler, even if I couldn’t afford the food market prices. It worked, the callouses are still there and the toddler is now a teen taller than me.

Here we are on the cusp of returning to gardening and I’m feeling timid-as if veggies should make a mama tremble. I’m nervous because I remember begging a barren field to produce, to nourish, to heal. I remember the lessons clear-you’ll either work for health or you’ll work to heal. Both require work.

The start of another project…words to remember: Quality will last, quantity fades.

The off grid years-I guess that’s a quick summary of those years, five years away from the world to find who we were and who Jesus is-taught depth. Depth of what is truly important. The places we met grace. Food, shelter, clothing-just what was needed physically was more than enough if our hearts and souls felt held safe. When the heart is peaceful calm, the soul joyous? The rest becomes icing on the cake, every morsel appreciated and savored.

If I perseverate on the distance between where I am and where I want to be, but skip looking back to see where I’ve been-what lies ahead will always seem too far away to reach.

Here’s the deal-the blunt tough love most of us don’t want to hear…you aren’t going to wake up everyday feeling like sunshine and rainbows…and that’s okay.

“The most common and the monstrous defect in the education of the day is that children fail to acquire the habit of reading.”  -Charlotte Mason 

I keep seeing new year, new me slogans posted across the internet-I roll my eyes at the message it splinters into the heart and souls of women across the world. Maybe it should be revamped: new year, another opportunity to become more of who God created you to be.

2023 doesn’t need to be my year-it needs to be His.

𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨. This is how to prep for a new year. We prepare by staying sensitive to the places and spaces God is calling, pointing us to notice-𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯.

𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨. This is how we individualize our daily lives specifically, individually, 𝘧𝘰𝘤𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘏𝘪𝘮.

𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳-

𝙂𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙞𝙤𝙪𝙨 𝙇𝙤𝙧𝙙, 𝖳𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖿𝖾𝖾𝗅𝗌 𝗇𝖾𝗐, 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾𝖿𝗎𝗅 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝗂𝖿 𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗏𝗒. 𝖨 𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖺𝗋𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽, 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝗉𝗈𝗍𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝖺𝗅 𝗆𝗂𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗅𝖾𝗌 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝖺𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀. 𝖳𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒, 𝖨’𝗅𝗅 𝗁𝗈𝗅𝖽 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗍𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍𝖾𝗋. 𝖪𝖾𝖾𝗉 𝗆𝖾 𝗁𝗎𝗆𝖻𝗅𝖾, 𝖿𝗈𝖼𝗎𝗌𝖾𝖽, 𝖿𝗎𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗒𝗈𝗎-𝗆𝗒 𝖠𝗇𝖼𝗁𝗈𝗋, 𝗆𝗒 𝗌𝖺𝖿𝖾 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾𝗇, 𝗆𝗂𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗅𝖾 𝖬𝖺𝗄𝖾𝗋. 𝖱𝖾𝗆𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖻𝗈𝗍𝗁 𝗁𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝗈𝗉𝖾𝗇, 𝗋𝖾𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗋𝖾𝖼𝖾𝗂𝗏𝖾. 𝖪𝖾𝖾𝗉 𝗆𝖾 𝗁𝗎𝗆𝖻𝗅𝗒 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝖿𝖾𝗌𝗌𝖾𝖽, 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝖾𝗇𝗍𝖾𝖽, 𝗋𝖾𝖽𝖾𝖾𝗆𝖾𝖽, 𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋𝖾𝖽. 𝖬𝖺𝗒 𝗆𝗒 𝖾𝗒𝖾𝗌 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗒 𝗈𝗉𝖾𝗇 𝗂𝗇 𝖺𝗐𝖾 𝖺𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗎𝗇𝗆𝗂𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖺𝖻𝗅𝖾 𝗁𝗈𝗅𝗒 𝗂𝗇 𝗂𝗍 𝖺𝗅𝗅. 𝖫𝖾𝖺𝖽 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗉𝗅𝖺𝖼𝖾𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗌𝗉𝖺𝖼𝖾𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝗀𝗋𝖺𝖼𝖾 𝗈𝗇𝗅𝗒 𝖸𝗈𝗎 𝗈𝖿𝖿𝖾𝗋. 𝖠𝗅𝗐𝖺𝗒𝗌 𝗀𝗋𝖺𝖼𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖸𝗈𝗎. 𝖬𝖺𝗒 𝖨 𝗅𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗓𝖾𝖺𝗅, 𝖾𝖺𝖼𝗁 𝗌𝗎𝗇𝗋𝗂𝗌𝖾 𝖺𝗇 𝖾𝖺𝗀𝖾𝗋 𝖻𝗅𝖾𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖾𝖺𝖼𝗁 𝗌𝗎𝗇𝗌𝖾𝗍 𝖺 𝗉𝖾𝖺𝖼𝖾. 𝘼𝙢𝙚𝙣 & 𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙣.

This may be one of the most sobering thoughts-Are your children a reflection of you or a reflection of Jesus? -sit with that a minute.

One day I saw it-the same people weren’t in the boat every time with Jesus. Some people stayed, some people stayed on the shore, some went back to their daily lives. When I saw it, it wasn’t awe striking, it ached.