the turning
The day had started rough. There had been words about college application essays, consonant blends(the “r” can be brutal, yes?), morning chores not done, and a bike that had brakes removed and thrown away(that one still does not make sense, but I digress).
We had torn each other to shreds-time outs, walks, and extra chores had not quite quenched our verbal fists.
And honestly, I was fed up to here (pretend you see me holding my hand high up in the air).
I knew what I was doing parenting-wise was not working today. My learned instinct wanted to shame them, make them feel inferior, make them feel perfection alone would not be enough, make them feel as awful as I felt.
But, then I took a breath...because shame is not love. They needed love if they were ever going to understand how to love. And it was my job to teach them.
Another breath...looking around at a kitchen that had dishes piled up, dust on the floor, dinner still a frozen unthought thing.
Breathe in...change of plans. New instructions given-flours dusting and butter melting and eggs whipping through. We could create instead of gnash apart, we would build something nourishing instead of tearing the seams that hold us together. And that is exactly what we did.
For a few hours, we took a messy dough of ingredients and baked bread. It will not win any awards; but, it won something even bigger. We won our day back. We pulled together. And as we broke that bread, we continued to break the dysfunction we had welcomed into our day.
“If we wait til everything is perfect to live joy, to invite joy, to show joy...joy may not ever end up happening. Leaning in to the perfectly imperfect, showing the way, one crumb at a time? It may end up being more than just a delicious decision. It could change your life.”
Our favorite bread recipe(*easily gluten free adaptable) will be part of our quarterly newsletter this autumn. Sign up below to receive our quarterly newsletter including autumn 2020 printable collection and devotional direct to your inbox. It would be a blessing to meet you there. -TaraLeigh
