the reminder of pearls

𝐈 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲, ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞. . . I was pretty sure that she had it 𝑎𝑙𝑙 together and had life figured out. I took her 𝑛𝑜𝑡-𝑠𝑜-𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑙𝑦 𝑔𝑖𝑣𝑒𝑛 advice and slowly started changing the core of who I was to fit ℎ𝑒𝑟 ideals; I thought that’s what good girls do, you know? Our relationship was still fairly new and I watched her closely. She knew how to carry a room with her laughter, had men hanging on to her words, and had other women sharing their heart to her.

I thought she had it all and I wanted the same...so I started copying her.

We ate together, we shopped together, and she picked out my clothes. At the next party, she started sharing other peoples’ heartaches as “prayer requests”, but truthfully it was gossip to keep people listening to her and without thinking, 𝐈 𝐣𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧. I’d learned to share elaborately and make the words juicier and I foolishly thought she was my new bff.

𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲? I had to work and my friend shared some of my biggest heartaches as juicy gossip fodder. That woman taught me an excellent lesson and I’m grateful I actually learned it.